“I tried every escape”
she told me. “Beer and wine
never worked. Then I
decided to look around, see
what was there. And I saw myself
naked. And alive. Would you
believe that?
Alive.”
Alive. This music rocks
me. I drive the interstate,
watch faces come and go on either
side. I am free to be sung to;
I am free to sing. This woman
can cross any line.
(p. 10 of Course Packet)
The voice of this poem seems to see the road as a means to escape a life that she has placed herself in by previous decisions. I am not sure who the person is that she had left, although I believe that by the way that she talks about the person it was her love, or someone else she had a deep connection with. Ever since then, she seems to be having trouble coping with life, saying "I try to touch myself," (p. 9) but isn’t even able to do it with knives. This makes me believe that she may have attempted suicide. It seems as though, whereas Kerouac felt everything where he lived was dead to him, the narrator of this poem felt as though there was nothing left in her that she could find that was alive. She feels that there is something there but she just can’t seem to release it. Someone she talks to, who appears to have gone through similar situations, at least as painful, seems to have found in the road her “talking blood.” (p. 9) She feels alive on the road, something she apparently had not felt anywhere specifically but just when she was in motion, seeing everything that was “there.” She finds herself naked, she is confronted by her trueself on the road. The narrator has followed in this woman’s words and actually finds herself on the road as well. In the case of the narrator of this poem, the destination cannot matter. For to settle down again anywhere would be to feel dead again. She has to keep moving to release her “talking blood.” It is as if the road is a therapeutic remedy to her pains.
Do you think that taking to the road can ever be a permanent fix to one's problems?
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The first part of this poem that starts “I tried every escape” really speaks the fact that you need to be happy with yourself on the inside before you can be happy in life. Many times you have heard of people who try all these different things to make themselves happy and find inner peace. However, very often a “road trip” inward is really what is needed in order to be happy and truly find yourself.
ReplyDeleteI also saw the similarity between this excerpt of the poem and Kerouac's view that everything was dead prior to his trip. Harjo seems slightly more definitive however, in expressing the road's overriding power to revive her through the repetition of the word "alive." The beginning of this excerpt shows a complete shift in her tone from the rest of the poem, which reflects a changed attitude and a new sense of freedom. This is why I am unsure if I agree with the point made that "to settle down again anywhere would be to feel dead again." I felt that she has come to a realization when she decides to "look around" and being on the road symbolizes moving on with her life with a renewed sense of identity and confidence. Perhaps her new resolve is reflected in the line, "This music rocks me." Music seems to play a liberating role, as it drowns out the "deadening" hum of the car or the daunting "soundlessness" that characterize her life initially. The final image of driving down the highway with loud music, passing people along the way seems to be the ultimate representation of the empowerment for which she is searching.
ReplyDeleteHas the narrator experienced a true transformation or merely a transient feeling of new life?
There is an inner void in the narrator as she describes "a field/ of talking blood/ that I have not been able/ to reach,/ not even with knives,/ not yet." Although their is a sense of deadness inside of her, she realizes that she can awaken it. With the drastic shift in tone after relating to someone else expierencing the same emptyness inside them, the narrarator becomes lifted and "alive". Unlike the person she talked to whom "saw [themself] naked. And alive", I don't think the narrarator has stripped herself and really found who she is. To me it seems by hearing from this person the narrarator feels that the road is her escape and she can be anything that she desires. There is a sense of freedom to the road as "this woman can cross any line".
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